I Just Lost It (Again)

Four years ago I participated in a six-week, Biggest-Loser-Style fitness and weight loss challenge called Just Lose It at my gym, Stevenson Fitness.

I wrote a weekly blog post about the program and my process and how terrible it all was.

Actually, it wasn’t terrible. I mean, it was because it was so damn hard. (And I’m not talking about the grueling workouts or the clean eating, I’m talking about the fact that I couldn’t drink wine for six weeks!)

But it was also awesome, because I lost 12 pounds, 4.2% body fat and a whopping 13.5 inches of flab. (Almost 4 inches were from my waist!) Then I continued on working out with my teammates and eating clean(ish) and went on to lose four more pounds. I even started running (something I had never done or had any desire to do) and ran in a 10K race. Yeah, I was rockin’ it.

Weight loss results
Me, four years ago partying it up after my final weigh-in

Well. That was four years ago. I managed to keep the weight off for two years, but then. You know how it is.

Eating healthfully takes planning and that takes time and who has that?

My plantar faciitis flared up again and I was unable to workout for a few months. (What did you say? I could have ridden the bike and done upper body? I can’t hear you because I’m plugging my ears and saying, “La-la-la-la-la.” Also. Shut up.)

And I got a new job a year ago that likes to keep its employees (very) well fed. (Turns out I forgot the word “no” was in my vocabulary when it comes to treats in the breakroom.)

Also, I was drinking a lot of wine. Like, one or two (or, okay, sometimes three) glasses a night. Not every night. But let’s say if a month has 30 days, then I probably had wine 28 of those days. So, okay. Every night.

And blah and blah and blady-blah-blah-blah. (Insert reasons and excuses here.)

So that 16 pounds I lost? It slowly crept back on. With a couple more. I found myself heavier than I’d ever been except for pregnancy and postpartum. Bleh.

And even though I obsessively got on the scale every single day (so it’s not like I didn’t know), I somehow managed to convince myself it wasn’t that bad. I mean, okay, so most of my pants didn’t fit anymore, but I still wore a medium top. (And the same shoe size!)

And then I saw this picture of me and almost cried.

Shane McAnally

And I’m not talking tears of joy because I’m with Shane McAnally, Nashville’s hottest songwriter and producer. And not because my bangs are all jaggedy. (Seriously, WTF is going on there?) Because look at my face. It’s so fat. And my face is always the last place I gain weight. It’s like my body hits maximum capacity and there is nowhere else for the fat to go, so it floats up to my face.

I knew it was time to get serious and do something. And since my gym was starting another round of Just Lose It, I decided to give it another go.

But as excited as I was to participate in the program again (well, maybe excited isn’t quite the right word), I also felt  a bit of dread. Not because I had to give up my beloved wine (okay, maybe a little because of that) or because of the hard work I was going to have to put in (okay, maybe a little because of that too), but because I felt like a bit of a failure. I mean, I succeeded in this program four years ago, and here I was again, three pounds heavier than when I started the first time.

Would everyone think I was a big loser (and not the right kind) for joining this program again?

As it turns out, it was quite the opposite. What I got was encouragement. High fives, and “way to goes” and “you look great.”

We all fall down. And when we do we have a choice: sit there in the dirt and cry about our fat face (as we’re stuffing it) or stand up, dust ourselves off, and cry about the wine we’re not drinking and the dark chocolate almonds with sea salt we’re not shoveling into our gullet because our mean trainer has given us a clean eating diet and making us do hard workouts six days a week.

Okay, that was a terrible analogy, but you know what I’m saying. The real failure is not falling down. It’s not getting back up.

So for six weeks…

I got up every morning at 5AM and did a seven minute workout that at first was really, really hard and by the end was (almost) easy.

I ate clean. (Bye bye wine, dark chocolate and break room goodies, and hello chicken, chicken, more chicken, vegetables, vegetables, vegetables and quinoa.)

I recorded every thing I ate and drank in a food journal. (Boy is that eye opening. If you’ve never kept a food journal, you should try it some time. You’d be amazed at how much mindless eating you do throughout the day. At least I was.)

I drank an ocean full of water. Daily.

I weight trained three days a week at 6AM (good morning!) with these awesome ladies under the guidance of our trainer, the mean, terrible, awful awesome Christy. (I do not think there was one workout that I did not whine at her. Or swear at her. Or both.)

Just-Lose-It-Workout-Program
The Iron Maidens (Yes, you are correct. We rock!)

I worked out three days a week on my own doing sadistic cardio routines created by the Just Lose It evil masterminds. (We were encouraged to do our cardio as a group, but our schedules never seemed to line up. Stupid jobs and kids.)

I went to multiple Happy Hours and only had club soda with a (teeny-tiny) splash of cranberry juice with a lime squeeze. (Make that Unhappy Hour.)

Also I stopped drinking wine. And eating chocolate. (Oh, I said that already? Sorry.)

It was terrible.

But also. It was amazing.

I felt great. (When I wasn’t achy and hungry.)

I slept great. (Turns out not drinking wine and being physically exhausted from grueling workouts helps you sleep. Who knew?)

And about half-way through, I started looking great.

In the end I lost 14.4 pounds, 6.9% body fat and 14.75 inches! (5 inches from my waist alone!!!) Even better than the first time. (Okay, okay, I had more to lose this time. But still.)

And did I mention that it was a contest? We competed as a team. (Sadly my awesome team, the Iron Maidens -great name, right?- were robbed and did not win.)

But we also competed as individuals and guess what? All that hard work, clean eating and whining about not drinking wine paid off, because I was the biggest loser of all. (Meaning, I was the winner!)

So, yes, I am a big loser. (Exactly the right kind.)

Just-Lose-It-After-Photo
Me, trying to recreate my Just Lose It post-final-weigh-in photo from 4 years ago. Yeah, I don’t know what’s going on with my hair, and I still have (more than) a bit of toning to do, but I’m still kind of rockin’ it.

 

 

 

Cabbage Soup Diary: Day Three

Stupid Cabbage Soup Diet! Yesterday I woke up to a yummy buttery baked potato. Today I get butternut squash and pomegranate seeds. I like butternut squash and pomegranate seeds, but I’d rather have a buttery baked potato. I’m already dreaming of the banana milkshake I’ll be having for breakfast tomorrow.

Also, I miss coffee. Yogi Green Tea is fine. In fact I really like it and it gives me (some of) the caffeine boost I need, but it’s just not the same as my decadent hell-of-a-lotta-cream-and-sugar coffee. I know the cream and sugar isn’t great if you’re trying to lose or maintain a healthy weight, but I only drink 2 cups a day and it makes me happy. I’m 47-years-old. I like things in life that make me happy. I’m not giving up my damn coffee. Well, except for this week.

Yogi Green tea fortune
The only thing multiplying is the hunger in my stomach

I lost another pound and a half, so that’s three pounds in two days. That might be worth giving up coffee for a week. Maybe. (Oh and if any of you are wondering if I’m ever going to disclose how much I weigh – forget it. I’ve already told you how old I am. That’s all you get to know!)

It was a little harder to sleep last night. I forgot the Melatonin because I was so tired (probably from depriving my body of calories) I just sort of fell into bed. I woke up in the middle of the night with that achy muscle deterioration/body detoxing whatever it is pain, but it wasn’t too bad.

I’m not going to lie. I thought this would be a little easier today because of the variety of fruits and vegetables, but it’s not. I’m never tempted to cheat, but I’m conscious almost all day long that I really don’t have enough food in me. At least not the right kind of food.

The morning wasn’t too bad. I had my pomegranate and squash for breakfast, then about an hour later I had some mango, avocado and grapes. That held me over until my delicious (notice the italics to emphasize my sarcasm) cabbage soup diet soup for lunch. Okay, so lunch was at 11:30. But still. That’s not too bad. I snacked all afternoon on snap peas and mini peppers.

Gas-X continues to be my friend. (For the most part.)

Cabbage Soup Diet Tip #3: Do not work out. Be lazy! One of the biggest bummers for me about this diet (you know other than the extreme hunger) is that I can’t work out. Well, it doesn’t say that you can’t work out, but I just don’t have the energy. Or the strength. I know that some of you will look at this as an advantage, but I actually like going to the gym and it kind of seems ironic that to lose weight quickly I have to give up working out for a week.

For dinner I roasted some vegetables and okay, okay, I cheated! I put on the tiniest bit of olive oil on my vegetables. I couldn’t help it. I wanted my roasted asparagus to taste good. (And it did – it really, really did!) But I didn’t slather it on like I usually do. I just sprayed some on with one of those little Misto Olive Oil Sprayers, so even though it is oil, it comes out more like Pam and it’s really just a tiny bit.

Tonight I made my family breakfast for dinner – scrambled eggs with cheddar cheese, bacon, hash brown patties and toast and I did not lick my bacony fingers or sneak one bite. So that has to count for something right?

Again, off to bed early. I think I’m going to dream of the bananas smoothie I’ll be having tomorrow!