I made Marley change her shirt before school on Tuesday – her 2nd to last day of 7th grade. Actually I told her she had to change her bra. She chose to change her shirt instead.
She was wearing her lacrosse practice jersey – a tank top that has arm holes that practically run down the entire length of the shirt. Underneath she had on a beige bandeau bra. (I will admit that she was wearing a regular bra under the bandeau.)
“Hello, here is my bra,” her outfit screamed at the top of its lungs. At least to me. It was 100% completely inappropriate for school. Or anywhere really.
I told her she had to wear a sports bra underneath if she wanted to wear that shirt to school. Not that the the shirt is appropriate for school with a sports bra (hell, the shirt is barely appropriate for lacrosse practice with a sports bra), but it’s better. And I get it. I really do. I understand why she’d want to wear her lacrosse practice jersey to school. It’s cuter than her uniform jersey (with the normal size arm holes).
But sports bras aren’t cool. Or cute. Sports bras are for playing lacrosse, not for letting boys people know you play lacrosse.
Cool girls. Cute girls. The populars. They all wear bandeaus exposed underneath their barely-there-with-practically-no-sides tank tops. They all do! At least according to Marley.
And she’s right. I’ve seen them. (And with too-short shorts too I might add.)
And I also understand why their mothers let them. Why I’ve let Marley. Because they are so young and they do look awfully cute. And it’s been so long since things have looked that cute on us. (Or is that just me?)
And I remember what it was like to be that age. To want to wear what everyone else was wearing.
And I remember hearing the words that are worse for “it’s time for bed” or “it’s time to wake up” or “remember to wash your face” or “clean your room.”
I remember hearing, “You are not wearing that to school.”
I hated hearing it and I hate saying it. But that’s what moms do. And one day she’ll say those words to her daughter and she’ll know what it’s like too.
But of course that day is a long way away. And until then I have a feeling I’ll have a lot more “you’re not wearing that to school battles to fight.”
*This post was inspired by Mama Kat’s writer’s workshop: 3.) Write a post inspired by the word: bra
Charlene Ross 
I am sure you would let Marley wear anything you were not allowed to wear to school.
It’s so hard when they look so stinkin’ CUTE in those outfits, isn’t it? I have a 14 year old daughter. She tried on some clothes the other day that bared her entire midriff. And it was darling. And I had to say no, because she’s 14. And her dad would have a fit. And I don’t want men looking at her like they would. And it just isn’t appropriate to show that much skin when you aren’t at the pool or beach. And about a dozen more reasons. She’ll get it some day (although I’m afraid to think what they will be wearing by the time SHE has a daughter!).
Yeah, the shortness of the shorts these days is unbelievable. At our school, it’s girls wearing the too-short shorts and not wearing the spandex bike shorts underneath. What’s funny is, they wear the spandex shorts, but then push them up really high so there’s no point in having put them on. 🙂 They will always find a way!